Category: General Musings

Labrador shoots its owner dead on hunting trip

AN overexcited dog has accidentally shot and killed its owner on a goose-hunting trip in Texas.

Perry Price, 46, had just shot a goose and went back to his pick-up truck to let his dog out to go find it in the brush.

He leaned over the bed of the truck and lay his shotgun down inside as he unhooked the tailgate, his hunting companion told investigators.

“When the dog got to jumping around it went off,” deputy Nacheal Bonin of the Chambers County Sheriff’s Department said.

Labs have always been with us as trusty servants and doting friends. My platoon used them in Vietnam to track down communists and kill ’em, thus achieving a double victory – one less communist and one more Lefty/Dole bludging/hippie freak/moratorium marching/Ho CHi Minh loving loser upset.

Now that’s what I call a hunting dog. Did it all on shitty dog biscuits and water although I recall on one Op, Dog Handler Arthur confessing to stealing some dog biscuits when we were short of rations. Did the dog complain…No!

Just seemed to sit their saying;

‘Let me help you, please, can I, please”

Hang on, I just remembered another bad Labrador moment when I caught my black Lab Chloe messing with the Easter Bunny some time back.

Had to buy some easter eggs for the kids and hide them in the backyard myself – saved on dog biscuits though!

Thousands of words have been written, maybe hundreds of thousands and millions will be, but only two matter.

Australia won

Letter to the Australian

MOTORISTS have contributed $365 million to government coffers in 2007 in speeding fines on the rationale fining saves lives.

So how many did fining save in 2007?

Four, based on the figures of 337 killed in 2006 and 333 in 2007. That means that saving each life cost $91.25 million.

Clearly the scheme is better at raising revenue than saving lives.

If it wanted to save lives, it would do what is being done in other countries, painting speed limits on the road as that has been proved to cut speeds and road deaths. But that won’t happen here as it does not raise money.

R.A. Marks
Drouin, Vic

Good point but I can’t see any government letting this income stream go.

I hope the year is good for you – all of you. Christians, Muslims, Leftie Luvvies, Centrist stalwarts and Right Wing pragmatics.

I’m off to tune up my bagpipes with the aim of terrorising little kids and annoying Sassenachs at the bewitching hour. For the one or two Greenies who visit these pages to see what the hell I’ll say next, it is this. The drones of the bagpipes are made from endangered and rare African Blackwood and the ivory looking fittings are just that – ivory. For PETA and other animal hugging idealists the bag is taken from a dead sheep bred to service mankind.

Life is good and all things are in place.

Except in Canberra where I wish the ALP a full year of being hit over the head with the reality stick. I note today the ALP Nanny state is busy with plans to censor the net. Tim Blair has an interesting discussion on the subject that is worth a read.

If you’re off to a party tonight then enjoy yourselves. If not then you have my commiserations.

See you next year.

On Sunday middle-child becomes a gym nazi and forces my wife and I to undertake a workout in the pool and on various forms of torture apparatus that in more peaceful times exist as stools – push-ups on a stool, tricep dips…Please, can I go back into the pool? NO!. I erroneously told her of Army PTIs saying do 20 then at 20 saying ‘one for the Queen, ‘one for the regiment’ etc. I was praying we didn’t get down to ‘one for Private Smith”, the Hygiene orderly.

Whilst recovering, old mate O’Reilly phones and through some convoluted conversation, bad reception and the fact that I was suffering the after effects of middle-child administered torture, I ended up volunteering to be Santa to a bunch of Pre-schoolers.

Which explains why I turn up at the Pre-School behind St Mathias at Zillmere on Monday morning dressed like a Coca Cola ad

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The teacher said I did great but let’s face it; playing Santa to a bunch of 5 year-olds doesn’t take much talent. Not a lot of critics there

Their utter belief in what I represented took me back to the farm at Pemberton, West Australia where as a young tacker, maybe five myself, I took a walk with my dog Honey through the bush near the farm house. Honey was named for her colour so you can guess the colour of one of her pups we kept and called “Treacle”.

After some time I’m confronted with an apparition of red and white standing in front of me. I was beside myself – Santa had personally come to this small farm in WA to speak to ME and ME only. Not my rotten girly, smartypants and older sisters, but ME.

I took advantage of the situation and plugged for a pedal car and without a touch or irony said I had been a good boy. Santa must already known this otherwise he wouldn’t have taken the time out to visit ME. I would’ve thought though; If Santa talks to Mum or Dad I’m dead but hey, go for the big lie!

What a coupe for a five year-old.

Somewhere there is a picture with me in a pedal car so my lies weren’t detected but the biggest thrill was Santa sounded just like my Mum. True! The bragging rights at school were undeniable – all other kids were impressed that Santa come to see ME and also sounded like my Mother.

This likeness with my Mother was proven at the Town Xmas party in the School Hall that very week when Santa appeared, this time for all the plebs, and sounded just like Mum.

My friends were convinced.

How long this lasted I can’t remember but I feel, when the truth dawned on me; as it does all kids at some time; my crash and burn was louder and hurt more than what other kids suffered. My loss of faith involved my Mum who scammed the hell out of a five year-old naive boy.

The pedal car was cool though, and I eventually forgave my Mum.

I had to, every time it comes up she rolls around laughing as do my smartypants sisters.

What’s your Christmas story?

SBS will produce a “quintessentially Australian” version of the top-rating BBC motoring program Top Gear to hit local screens next year.

BBC Worldwide Australasia’s head of sales Julie Dowding said the deal was very exciting.

“We are very proud that the first global deal for a local version of Top Gear has been done here in Australia,” she said.

Top Gear host Jeremy Clarkson added:

“I’m delighted that Top Gear is going to Australia. Maybe the first guest could by Jonny Wilkinson He whose name will never be mentioned in my house, referring to Britain’s rugby player and World Cup hero.

Yeah….right!

Pommy footballers aside, I do look forward to the show.

Spent the weekend at Chudley Stud, Cooroy with the Cattle Club from the local Nudgee boys college. The Cattle Club is a program run by a friend that teaches boys, most of them city slickers, how to ‘show’ cattle. It may sound simple but isn’t. The lads need to learn a lot about handling cattle and develop sufficient confidence to lead a beast weighing up to a tonne in such a manner as to suggest to the judge that he has total control.

Working in cattle yards during the day and socializing a night makes a pleasant change from city living. Meeting the local farmers, all of whom are threatened by the Traveston dam, highlights the impact governments and population growth has on people. They are not happy and I do feel for them but the march of civilization leaves many damaged along the road for the better good. When I pointed out that all this angst has already been seen in the Wolfdene Dam project where land was resumed and a dam could’ve been built but the project was canceled by the Goss government with Swan and Rudd in attendance, nobody felt any better.

Socializing with teachers has it’s fascination as well. I took part in the following conversation;

Teacher; “Did you read about the toad fence being proposed by Beattie…or was it Bligh…no – has to be the nationals”
Self:”No, haven’t heard but I imaging it would be the NT government – they are concerned about toads”
Teacher ” No, thinking about it, it would have to be Howard throwing money around to get votes”
Boy commenting from sidelines “Yeah, that Howard’s an idiot”
Teacher; “Yeah, must have been Howard”

So, Howard is charged, fronts the court of bias and is found guilty on the basis of a biased mind.

As you can imagine, a minute or two after I got home I googled anti toad fence and found that the fence is one of the suggestions being considered by the Territory Government in an effort to protect native species from the toads.

Some people should simply be disenfranchised.

THE slouch hats of the Australian Light Horse regiments returned to Beersheba yesterday, 90 years to the day after the 1917 battle, as 50 mounted re-enactors formed up for a repeat of the famous charge

Read about the original charge here

This time to Lamington National Park

I don’t and can’t climb mountains anymore but I can run base camps for college excursions so I give some of my time to manage the logistics of feeding and accommodating mobs of young men (about 15yr old) for the local college that is the Alma Mater of my two sons.

It’s always good to see these young men in action as the undertake, for the first time for most of them, fairly arduous walks through the rain forests. One walk they do is 18 km and it is over very mountainous country. They literally develop and even mature a little in front of my eyes. It was ever thus; force a group of young men to do something arduous together and there is always at least a hint of teamwork at the end of it. They are full of stories of blisters, sore backs and feet and as they sit around the camp fire at night and talk the day through the blisters multiply in the telling as does the severity of the sore feet or backs.

A beer for the teachers and parents at night (I don’t work for nothing!) makes for a pleasant couple of days and I trust that by the time I get back the media have stopped talking about that bloody worm.

If you haven’t been to Lamington put it on your must-do list. It’s worth it